You really can’t mend a broken person and you shouldn’t even try.
Either you accept them as they are and give them the space and time to heal, no matter how long it takes, or you let them be and don’t try and be a part of their lives.
You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. And, you definitely can’t blame them for not healing in the time that you think they should take to heal.
When you decide to enter someone’s life, despite their warnings, you can’t expect anything. You better be strong enough to love selflessly or just give up.
It’s not their fault that they don’t have space for you in their life. It’s not their fault that they can’t keep up appearances or fit societal norms, because they have more important things to think about and worse things to deal with.
I know that. I’ve always known that. Then why does it still hurt when someone you care for doesn’t even think about you or how their words or actions will affect you?